It is amazing how things that feel so overwhelming can be overcome when you share them with somebody else. There was a huge wave of human connection last week when Sesame Street’s Elmo tweeted the words ‘how are you’ and got millions of responses. People just want to talk to someone about how they are, if that someone is brave enough to hear the truth. Of course, sometimes it is good news!

I’m as guilty as anyone when I don’t truly follow up that throw -away question to pursue the reality behind the first safe answer. If you are in a rush, then don’t go beyond ‘hello’, but if you have the time, then ask it twice, waiting for the real reply. The worst thing to do is to answer for the other person. ‘You seem great’ shuts down the conversation before it has even started.

The power of two could also mean the power of two eyes noticing struggle, or two ears actively listening to the response. I remember being sorely tempted to bang my finger on the table and tell my doctor to look me in the eye when he asked me how I was and turned to his screen when I replied. I didn’t of course, but maybe I should have.

So the next time you are in contact with another person, try and remember that you might be the only one to see them that day, the only one to hear them, the only one to follow up your enquiry about how they truly are . This is the gift you can give, if they want it. And I hope that somebody else does it for you too.

So how are you right now? Truthfully?