That’s me at the moment. I know sometime soon everything will settle but when you’re in the middle of chaos, it is hard to see.

I’m trying to look away from the dust circles on our kitchen table and the pale shade of our blue TV stand. I’m telling myself to remember that in only a week, my son will be back from uni and my daughter on her way home from Berlin. These certain, concrete things will happen, I know. Is it possible to be un – discombobulated, or is that just ‘combobulated’?

In any case, things will settle down again, as clouds rise up and fall, or waves break on the shore. For my own sanity, and for yours, we have to believe things will order themselves. I’ll tell you about that in a month or year when I’m on the other side of it.

Again, I see the vital need for hope. What is life without it? A dusty house, an immobile person, a wasteland of no growth or progress. I don’t want to believe in an upside down future. I want to live in hope that something rigid will shift and nothing will feel discombobulated again.