Just spent the last twenty minutes reading posts from at least 30 people who have MS, finishing the sentence, ‘if I could, I would…’. It made me smile, to think that other people have the same wishes as me, but it was sad too.
Nobody wished they could start their own business, or get rich and famous. A lot of people just wanted to be able to walk along a beach, play football with their son, or go shopping with their daughter.
In that moment, I realised again that MS or any form of bad health cuts to the chase, and seeks out what really matters. So here’s mine:
If the pills I’m starting in two weeks time do what everybody hopes they will, and I am significantly better, I will:
– walk my children home from school.
– swim at least 40 lengths like I used to.
– book a city break with my husband and pound the pavements beside him, looking up, around and behind me without falling over.
– wear high heels once in a while, and be elegant.
– ride a bike around the park without being frightened I’ll lose my balance, or not be able to get off afterwards.
-go out in the evening and not worry about losing my valuable sleep.
– chase Samuel and Ciara round the rose bushes in Lady Dickson, rather than standing still and waiting for them to be done.
– walk in front of people and not be self-conscious about my inability to follow a straight line, the sound of my dragging feet or unexpectedly falling over.
– actually go into a shop and browse, rather than standing at the entrance and straining to see what’s there.
-pick my way along a row of seated people, or round tables and chairs, without either accidentally sitting on their knees (!), or tripping over furniture.
-blog about my exciting adventures, and stop writing about my poor health.
Well, it all might be a pipe dream, but it’s always good to hope…