Change it.

A few nights ago I recognised a sadness in myself. I have always loved being a mother. Over the past few years it has felt that my two children have been looking after me more than me looking after them. As wonderful as it is, it never feels like the way I expected it to be. My son, when he’s not at uni, cooks for me. My daughter willingly takes on her role as what she calls ’emotional support’. I have someone who cleans the house for me, Tesco delivers shopping to my door. My husband often comes home from work and prepares dinner for us all.

Maybe it’s an old fashioned tradition, but I always thought it was my job to shop, cook, clean and mother. Without that, who am I?

Do you ever feel the role you call your own has been taken from you? But wait! You will always be what you choose to be. So I can’t bake buns or cook extravagant dinners, but it doesn’t make me less of a wife or a mother. I am those things, however well I take on the tasks connected with them. 

The core of being a mother is not about what I do, it’s about how I love. Even if you’re not officially a mother, if you have people in your life, love them. I will be more than able to do that, no matter what physical difficulties rise up to prevent me. The same goes for you. Nothing can ever prevent you from loving someone. When I hug my children, I remember that.