The way you see things or experience them is not the same as anyone else. Recently I have been learning that. Have you ever heard one event being related by two people with entirely opposite versions of what they thought had happened? Yesterday I realised, to my shame, that I have been so wrapped up in my poor health that I forgot everyone around me is involved too. Nothing in life impacts just one person.
On another note, it is easy to pigeon hole children into the path you assume they will go. My son used to talk about engineering but when asked directly in the summer he said he was interested in medicine! Never say, ‘but I thought you liked’… Always let people step outside of the person you have pegged them as.
The question, ‘what do you do?’ is a very restricted question too. No-one deserves to be pushed into one word. You might be self-employed, part-time, retired, unemployed or too unwell to work at all. But what are you besides that? So much more.
We sang a kids’ song yesterday, ‘you are a promise, you are a possiblity… You are a great big bundle of potentiality’. It’s slightly silly but actually, true. Never think that you are all out of chances. Don’t let anyone push you into one dimension. If someone asks you that constraining question I would follow it up with ‘and what else?’ Life is a multi-faceted, surprising mix of experiences.
There is always something going on in our lives that we cannot control. I was talking about that today with someone and they said if the queue of traffic was too slow-moving, they would just get out and walk. To do that was to re-take control. (I didn’t ask about the other poor person left to mind the car!)
There is one lily in my parents’ pond. We have all been watching and waiting for it to show off its petals. One day it did, but since then the leaves are refusing to unfurl. It could be the cold weather, it could be the changing season, but nothing will get it to open.
I am dreadful at driving anywhere new. I remember going somewhere a couple of years ago. I put it into Google maps, turned the radio off and the spoken directions on. Unfortunately when I am nervous I tend to turn before I need to. That day, I heard at least twice the words ‘make a U-turn’. And then what? I drove on, blindly hoping I was heading in the right direction. A great approach, don’t you think?
On my wedding day, nearly twenty years ago, it was a typical Donegal day: sunshine and showers. We got in to the church in the sun and for a short while afterwards it stayed dry. But then the heavens opened, nearly everyone headed to the reception and we got our photographs taken in the church. Two cars did stay behind and tooted their horns behind us through the town. The funny thing was, after months of planning, the rain did not bother me one tiny bit.